Numero uno! Although I am pleased as punch about the new Super Target w/ the grocery store, pulling into the parking lot I spy a HUGE GRIEVANCE!! All of the cart return thingies are in the front row of the parking lot. WTH?!! Which told me that there were no mothers on that planning board!! So I have a 4 year old and an 80 lb. 17 month old (not really, but he feels like it) that I have to haul WITH my cart cover because...well, just because eeeewww! So we park in the back because every mother knows that if you try to park near the front, some idiot will park so close to your car that you won't be able to get yourself, much less the kids and all the paraphernalia out! The wind is blowing like a banshee and so I will admit that I had a bit of a 'tude going in. I own that. But does that mean I am wrong when I get inside the store and see Kim Kardashian staring at me from People magazine with the headline, "I thought I'd be married by now", and I give an audible, "Oh Kim, SHUT UP!". When my daughter looked up at me I realized that was out loud and not in my head. Although in glancing around, I got a few head nods as if to say, "Go on w/ your bad self, sista!". So on I went.
I do love me some Kim Kardashian, but that kind of whining I just can't tolerate. Lucky for her I didn't see Marie Osmond on Oprah before I saw that cover. I might have had to whip out a Sharpie. (Why, you ask? Oh...no reason. :) ) Poor little Kim is 30 and thought she'd be married by now. Well guess what, Kimmie? I thought I'd be living in a mansion, getting paid to get facials and smile at parties. Oh no, wait...that's YOU! Life isn't fair, but you've gotten more than your share so maybe having to wait a few more years to be married ain't all that bad! (FYI, if I start whippin' out the "aint's", it's time to duck.)
I'd hate to have to add Kim to my prayer list alongside Camille Grammer. Next thing you know, Kim will be married w/ 2 kids, 6 nannies, a butler, and Alice from Brady Bunch. All I can suggest to Miss Kardashian is that she call 1 (800) waaaaaa, or maybe www.stopcryingyoupatheticbaby.com. It's just pissing the rest of us off.
What I’m Packing: Cruise to Havana…
2 weeks ago