Happy New Year, I'm drawing a blank.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Nothing. I got nothing...maybeeeeeee...nope. Nada. Kicking off 2011 w/ a bang, I tell ya! Maybe there's just a log jam of rants. Watched Ax Men last night and learned that logs get jammed and clog up the process. Thinkin' I have a log jammed. I get little trickles of thought and inspiration, but the big gushers seem to be few and far between. Probably because I've just got too much jammed up in there. I know I've got a log marked 'Christmas Tree' because although I took all the decor down 4 or 5 days ago, this tree is still sitting here. Staring at me. With it's lights on. I mean, it's right here next to me. Staring. Cuz to have a tree sitting, staring, WITHOUT lights on is just sad. This is a tad less sad. But it's like he's saying, "Get off your lazy butt and take me DOWN already!! This is getting embarrassing!!". I know this is what he's saying. Stop looking at me! Stupid tree! I'll turn those lights out. Don't think I won't!

The reason this tree has not come down yet is because of log #2, which is cooking. Since we had zero plans for the New Year and since my mom is laid up with a broken leg, I decided to be festive and cook some fun stuff. So that involved menu planning, shopping, cooking, cleaning and delivering. Mix into that logs #3 and #4 which are Kaitlyn and Adam. Had to take care of them in betwixt and between. Ok, then there's the laundry log...the "Gymboree mismarked several pairs of their leggings as size 6 when they are really only a 4 or 5 so I have to go through, measure and return them" log, the "it's Sunday and hubby has the kids so I better get out while the gettin's good" log, the "Kaitlyn is in school and baby is napping so you better keep your New Year's resolution and blog more even though you haven't had a shower yet" log. Let's see, what else...oh, the "I have a new Kindle that I love and have no time to read like I want to because I have all of these logs" log, the "Kaitlyn wet the bed last night so we have emergency laundry that has to cut ahead of all the other laundry" log and in the meantime I realized that there's a new log today marked, "My new everyday sweater that I love is DRY CLEAN ONLY which does NOT make it an everyday sweater anymore!". I am a mother, dammat!!! We do not DO 'dry clean only'! Can I get an amen!?!

See, told ya there was a rant in there somewhere. This is a testament to the fact that I can go on and on with nothing...about nothing...to infinity and beyond. Maybe in the process of this nothingness I have unjammed a log or two. Blog is done, now off to change laundry and shower! But first I have to go slap this tree.

The Search is OVER! ~cue angels~

For YEARS, and I do mean YEARS, I have searched for a Christmas Tree topper.  Unlike my success w/ antenna ball toppers, the perfect Christmas Tree topper has eluded me.  Year after year, I feel unmeasurable joy when I'm decorating my tree, until...Topper Time.  Ugh.  Freakin' Star Topper w/ it's 4 inch cord!!  What am I supposed to do with that?!  Anyone?!  And then there's that clip that will snap your finger right off, if you aren't careful!  Of course the star is too heavy so after clipping, you get to watch in horror as it starts to leeeeean.  Double UGH!  And what about the height?  Why is it the tree always goes right up to the ceiling so the topper won't fit (even if you COULD get it on!) without dinging the ceiling?!  I don't know about you but I'm NOT A FAN of dinging my ceiling!  So all of my happy happy, joy joy of decorating the tree is ruined in the last 5...ok, who am I kidding...30 MINUTES of trying to wrastle (it's a word) with the topper.  This is about the point where I consume 2 1/2 lbs of the fudge I've made for Christmas.  Ughtothemax.

Ok, so today...this year...will be different.  I have found the answer to my prayers!  Yes, I have actually prayed for this.  Although it comes out more like, "Oh my GOD, PLEEEEEZE fit, you MOTHER%&*%^!!  If we can put a man on the moon (and why is it the man on the moon is always brought into it?!  Thank God for him.)  WHY can't someone make a freakin' TREE TOPPER that FITS and isn't completely USELESS!?!".  Those days are over, kids.  And speaking of kids...those days are over just in time so that I don't scare my children. (any further.)

Gaze upon all that is wonderful and glorious.  All is calm...all is bright...

Why the FRICK didn't someone think of this sooner?!!  The angst I could have avoided over the last 15 years!  Aaaaaahhhh...this little gem is mine!  And for only $16!  Thank you Pottery Barn, for anticipating my every need and providing me with free shipping.  I shall sing your praises every Christmas from this day forward, til death do us part.  Amen.

Btw (By The Way, get with it!), click on the title of this post and it will take you to Pottery Barn Kids where you too, can purchase your own tree topper!  Aren't I fancy?  :)  (and not getting paid by PBK to do this...yet!)